Monday, April 27, 2009

My Opinions

No, I'm not going to get on a soapbox and state my opinions on controversial things and yes I know you all are happy about that. This post is to admit that I make opinions about things that I have no business being opinionated about. I jump to conclusions that are completely wrong. I have posted in the past about how much it hurts when people ask us about having children or having more children as the case is now. They just don't stop to think that we may have had issues with infertility. If they didn't go through it, it is probably the farthest thing from their mind and I understand that. Unfortunately I do the exact same thing. I have made judgements about couples that I know that I shouldn't have made. I don't know people's pasts unless they tell me or I ask (which I don't because I know how much that can hurt, also). I am guilty of thinking things that just simply aren't true about people. Why is it that infertility has taught me so many valuable life lessons, but I can't seem to get this aspect of myself under control? I am so opinionated about things and people that I can't see past my own thoughts and judgements. I hate that I am that way and I am striving to do better. I don't want to be that role model for Chloe Jo. I want to be the role model that gets the whole story before making rash judgements. Though, I don't want to have any confusion on opinions verses beliefs. I want to show Chloe Jo how to be strong and to stand fast and believe in what the Bible says, but I don't want her to see how judgemental I can be. I want to fix this. I need to fix this. I have to grow as a person and as a Christian and get past this part of my self.
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4 comments:

Anonymous said...

parenting is wonderfully humbling, isn't it?

The Mom said...

(((Hugs))) It is all a process! One of the things I have learned as a parent is that "know better, do better" really does exist and that it is a whole lot easier than I thought it would be. I quickly learned to bite my tongue when I wanted to say things; I bit simply because I didn't want what I said to (A) be repeated (B) didn't want him to take what I said as the final truth (so to say...) My parents had no qualms with saying what was on their mind and that did not better my life. I want my son's life to be better than mine. It is an amazing process that you are at the very beginning of.
Thankfully, in my case, I no longer have to bite my tongue. My son has opened my eyes and it is really actually hard to have a bad thought about anyone! (Unless I feel a threat to my child or any other children!) He sees only the good in people and tries so hard to cheer everyone up and make each day better.

About people asking about having more children...ugh! I did not go through nearly what you have done to conceive, but that question annoys me to no end. My son will be 6 in a few weeks and recently I have heard, on several occassions, "Well, since you haven't had another yet, I guess you won't be, will you?" What?! Ay yi yi!

(If you would like, I will send you an invite to my blog...that way you can know who this crazy girl who comments on your blog is. LOL)

Lisa said...

I would love an invite to your blog! Thanks!

Melissa said...

{{{{{{{{Hugs}}}}}}}}}}

I understand exactly what you are talking about because I also strive to be a better role model for my children. It still amazes me how much they continue to help me learn about myself and my own shortcomings.