Thursday, May 21, 2009

Ugh

I am now the owner of a perscription....for birth control pills. Sigh.

I had my post partum check up yesterday. Everything looked fine and dandy and my doctor/his medical assistant talked me into getting a perscription. And yet, I haven't gotten it filled...and I don't know if I'm going to. I'm left with a huge decision to make. A decision that I have thought about and pondered for a while now. What do I do? Do I go ahead and start the pills and run the risk of losing out on this what is generally fertile time in my life possibly missing the chance to have another baby or do I completely throw caution to the wind and forget about the perscription? I'm not sure I'm going to go back to work. Russ has started seriously looking for a preaching job. Most of these positions don't pay for insurance so we will be buying out of pocket. That means that we won't have maternity because it is so stinking expensive...plus there is the added bonus of a waiting period.

What I want to do is throw all caution to the wind. There is a possibility that I won't be able to have another baby anyway even with more treatments. But there is also the posibility that I will all of the sudden become a fertile myrtle and get pregnant again right away. That's scary, but it would be such a blessing. The cost factor is what is making this decision difficult. The logical side of me says to take the birth control. It's for the best financially. But my heart is tellling me different.

Why does infertility have to be so hard??? Even after a baby there are still hard decisions that have to be made and it stinks!
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12 comments:

Jackie. said...

Infertility is indeed a stinker! I'm not sure how to balance the mind with the soul, the feeling with the financial. That's one of the hardest things about it. Wishing you lots of luck.

Ang said...

Oh bless your heart!! What a hard decision!!! Those kind of decisions are life altering..I can just imagine how hard that is for you. I remember my mama always saying "if you wait until you can afford children, you'll never have them'..ha and BTW thanks for your post..that was really sweet of you:)

Anonymous said...

I'm sorry to hear that you are faced with such a hard decision.... I have no idea what I'd do... I do know that there is a gal that I work with... She just had her 3rd baby in 3-4 years! I know with her first she was under infertility treatment... Not trying to scare you. :-) It will all work out.

M said...

I'll be praying for you as you make your decison. (((HUGS)))

Ashley said...

I had a 2 week check up and go back for a 6 week one as well...she brought up BC and I mentioned not wanting to do it...we shall see. I certainly understand both sides of your situation.

Christy said...

Just wanted to share my story- not that it will help you make any decisions, but it is very similar to yours. Two years trying, multiple failed IUIs and finally preggers by IVF. Got the script at my pp appt- didn't take it. Got pregnant when DS was 3 months old. We are self employed so our insurance does not cover materity either. BUT we are THRILLED that we will be having another. I went back and forth, just like you and just decided to go for it...Luckily we have been able to pay the Dr bills as they have come up and have already made arrangements with the hospital for a discount if we pay it all up front-so we are saving for that.
Good luck with your decision- it is a hard one for sure!!!

Miss Tori said...

Lisa, can't really provide any advice as to what to choose, but I will give you some food for thought.

Assurant Health Insurance Company offers individual health insurance plans with maternity riders that you can purchase with a huge deductible (like $10,000) for about $7 a month (for the maternity rider, not the insurance itself). What this $7 a month buys you is the network discounts, which normally equate to about 50%. That way, if you do have to self fund your pregnancy, you can at least have access to the network discounts which will help you save some serious cash.

If you have any questions, e-mail me and I'd be glad to help. You should be able to contact your local insurance agent, or just go online to search for Assurant.

Brett and Audra said...

GL with your decision. I can imagine you're torn. I know what I would do...anyone have a paper shredder??

Melissa said...

Was that Dr. Stanczyk who talked you into it or did you go see Dr. Stein? Honestly, if was me, I would throw caution to the wind and not take the BC pills. Even if I had to pay the doctor/hospital bills for the rest of my life, it would have been the best investment ever. Unfortunately though, no one can tell you what is right for you guys.

And yes, infertility most definitely stinks!

Hollie said...

It is hard to make those decisions. We decided to get on the pill for a while. But I do know how you feel. Good luck deciding.

Chelley N said...

I wouldn't fill the script if it were me. Everything will work out even if you have another really soon... lots of people do it on shoestring budgets. Money doesn't make a happy home and family.

Also, if you want to make sure you have a few extra months, there are other precautions you can take besides the pill. I would just hate to take anything that alters my hormones (I think the pill caused some of my problems and is of the devil, personally).

Mercedes said...

I am with your sister. There are other safer methods that let you change your mind any minute! Course it is really yours and Russ's decision. So I should just butt out and pray for everything to go well for you.