I am now the owner of a perscription....for birth control pills. Sigh.
I had my post partum check up yesterday. Everything looked fine and dandy and my doctor/his medical assistant talked me into getting a perscription. And yet, I haven't gotten it filled...and I don't know if I'm going to. I'm left with a huge decision to make. A decision that I have thought about and pondered for a while now. What do I do? Do I go ahead and start the pills and run the risk of losing out on this what is generally fertile time in my life possibly missing the chance to have another baby or do I completely throw caution to the wind and forget about the perscription? I'm not sure I'm going to go back to work. Russ has started seriously looking for a preaching job. Most of these positions don't pay for insurance so we will be buying out of pocket. That means that we won't have maternity because it is so stinking expensive...plus there is the added bonus of a waiting period.
What I want to do is throw all caution to the wind. There is a possibility that I won't be able to have another baby anyway even with more treatments. But there is also the posibility that I will all of the sudden become a fertile myrtle and get pregnant again right away. That's scary, but it would be such a blessing. The cost factor is what is making this decision difficult. The logical side of me says to take the birth control. It's for the best financially. But my heart is tellling me different.
Why does infertility have to be so hard??? Even after a baby there are still hard decisions that have to be made and it stinks!
Brianna's 7th Birthday
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