Thursday, July 10, 2008

My Thoughts Scare Me Sometimes

As you know, in the evenings I normally go for a walk around the golf course we live on. My route is 3.3 miles and takes me about an hour to walk. This leaves me ample time to collect my thoughts and obsess, mainly about infertility. Tonight was no different. I started my walk and soon my thoughts meandered over to our fertility treatments. Okay, okay, my thoughts never really leave that topic and there was no meandering involved. I just like using that word. Anyway, so I started thinking about what we have done:

*thinking* Four clomid cycles with timed intercourse. These weren't successful (at least I don't think this last cycle was successful. We will see this weekend). What next? IUI's. IUI's with what? We've done four cycles with clomid and this drug tends to kill your lining after a while so we probably won't do that again. Ok, femara. Three IUI's with femara. What if these aren't successful? What next? Maybe a laparoscopy? Or and endometrial biopsy? And after that? IUI's with injectables? Maybe I'm not a good candidate for injectables. I made three or four follicles with each clomid cycle. What would injectables do? I would probably make eight. And they would all probably fertilize and implant. I would be pregnant with octuplets. YIKES! Maybe we could get a free suburban? I would definitely have to get WIC so we could feed all of them. How big would I get? I probably wouldn't be able to carry them past 30 weeks or so. Then they would have to live in the NICU for a couple months. But, I could buy eight of those super cute onesies from They could leave the hospital in them. What would we name eight babies? We would definitely have four boys and four girls. Andy, Logan, Kyle, Colby, Maya, Chloe, Emilee, Leanne....Then we would have to think of middle names....and I would have to find a different font for some of the names to fit on the Christmas stockings. Christmas with eight babies would be fun....*end thoughts*

And on my thoughts went. It seems even worse when typing it and reading back over it. I think I'm certifiably crazy.


Courtney said...

haha! my thoughts are way crazier than yours so don't feel bad! And I think that can be true about the injectibles since you respond so well to clomid, but everyone is different... so you won't know until you try it. I'm hoping you will never have to get that far, but I can relate to the "wondering what's next" thoughts.

heavenlytini said...

i do that too!!! wow could u imagine having 8 wow some people think that's alot but i would love that as long as they all were healthy and yeah i love those onesies on cafepress. and what cute christmas cards those would be with all eight of them. ahhh to dream but you gotta believe one day all of our dreams and prayers will come true!!! good luck

Nikki said...

:-) Your thoughts aren't crazier than anyone elses! I'm just trying to picture you and Russ with 8 kids!! Oh my God! But seriously - good luck. I really hope that your prayers get answered, and one of these cycles works quickly - so you don't have to reach the injectable stage at all!